We need to talk about Twilight.
Through some twist of fate, I finally finished reading the last Twilight novel in the same weekend I saw the Twilight movie. Holy. Moly.
Let’s talk about the book first. I’m not gonna try to make excuses for myself as to why I purchased and read every book in this series. I tell you - not as an excuse, but as a reality - these books are like crack. You hate what you are doing when you are reading. You hate yourself for reading again later. You want to yell at the people in the book to just COME ON!!! and throw the book across the room. But you cannot stop. You just CAN’T.
I admit, I really was looking forward to Bella and Edward (OK who names a freaking heartthrob character something like EDWARD past the year 1875?) getting married. But… without ruining this for anyone who still hasn’t read this yet wants to… seriously? Also, I threw up about 475 times while reading this book.
And yet I still saw the movie.
The movie. THE MOVIE. I’m going to admit that even if I were not addicted to the crack Stephanie Meyer deals out in measured literary doses, I probably still would have seen this movie. No…definitely. Definitely would have seen this movie. It wasn’t the compelling previews with growls, angry stares and killer lines like “Hold on, spider monkey” (What the WHAT?!) - it was that people are going NUTS for this stuff. And that poor guy who plays Edward Cullen. Wow. Before I talk about the actual quality of the movie, let me just say, there is something VERY priceless and awesome about sitting in the dark with 100 14-17 year old girls who giggle at the screen like we are IN A MIDDLE SCHOOL CLASSROOM.
But, sweet heavens, THE MOVIE. It was just downright goofy sometimes. In a bad way. Maybe my heart has hardened to stone since I was 16, but Edward Cullen was NOT dreamy - he was CREEPY!!! OMG, so creepy. Oh, yeah, and he looks like he’s about thirty years old. That would not be such a bad thing if Bella didn’t look actually 17. And the dialogue! And James… And…yeah there’s just way to much to try to explain. The book wasn’t the Best Thing Ever, but I felt like it had some Harry Potter level potential. I was disappointed.
On the bright side, there are always three more movies coming out…
Dialogue
Balie
on a Tuesday
at 6:36 pm
Goofy is a good word. I’m so glad I didn’t wake up early on Sunday morning so I could drive 65 miles and see Twilight with my cousin. Because that would be fairly ridiculous. We did, however, enjoy exchanging glances and mouthing “WHAT THE HECK?!” throughout the movie.
Jillie
on a Sunday
at 7:39 pm
ZOMG.. I definitely walked out of the movie because I had better things to do.. It was like watching a train wreck. A train that was full of dead air and awkward glances that wrecked into a train full of blue tint and underwear models. Time to start looking forward to the next Harry Potter movie
Shannon
on a Monday
at 1:16 am
Balie: If I hadn’t been so embarrassed over forcing Cameron to go, I would have mouthed “What the heck!?” to him a lot more. However, I spent most of the time whispering, “It wasn’t like that in the book!” and then scooting farther down in my chair from said embarrassment.
Jillie: You are a better person than I am.
Jillian
on a Tuesday
at 6:45 am
hahahaha, oh shannon.. I completely sympathize with you regarding your decision to convince a significant other to attend said cinematic experience resulting in humiliation. I was the one who suggested we leave though. I couldnt take it. I had read every book and now Stephanie Meyers disappoints me. lol
Shannon
on a Wednesday
at 6:31 pm
I’ve heard tell that if you go see it with only other girls, it is a totally different experience, i.e. you come out liking the movie. Not sure how much I believe that one…